Facing the faceless opponent

There were quite a few thoughts passing through my mind for the past few days, and I was wondering if I want to write about them at all. There has been a lot of Facebook updates, posts, news articles, rants, demands, speculations about the position of women in India, her safety, her existence, her dignity - triggered mainly by the recent rape case in Delhi. (Note that this is not the first or the worst of heinous incidents to have happened in India, yet for whatever reasons if this incident actually manages to kick start and sustain an awakening within the Indian hearts, then I am glad for that.)

Last year, around the same time, I was walking freely on the streets of Delhi by myself. Before I landed there, I remember my parents telling me to take extra care, because it is Delhi, and it is not safe. I myself was mildly scarred by an experience as a child. While travelling in a bus in Delhi, I recall a man standing next to me and trying to push himself onto me, while I was sitting and trying my best to veer away from him. Not a pleasant memory to carry with you at the age of 11 or 12.

However, when I came to Delhi this time round, after many years, and travelled in the metro, I was delighted and did not hesitate twice about moving about freely. And why not, I thought, I travel all over the world on my own. I don't get scared to walk alone on the streets of a foreign country, then why indeed should I feel scared walking on the streets of my own country? But this really shows how detached from reality I am. We tend to take our own life experiences and believe them as the truth. And this also means that we are still lacking in awareness. Many of us (the more privileged section of the society) may never fully understand the gravity of the problems that are lurking on our streets. And this means we are not prepared for a day when we are taken by surprise. And more importantly we are not prepared to fight the battle, which needs to be fought to actually make our society a safe place to live in.

While many people are asking for stricter laws and penalties against crimes like rape and molestation, somehow I can't help feeling that the degree of punishment is not the only way of attacking this problem. According to this news article, it says that out of 635 rape cases reported in Delhi in 2012, only 1 was convicted. And this is considering only the cases which were reported. Because I am sure there were several others which were not. How is giving capital punishment to the 'one' convicted criminal stopping the 634+ others? If this data is anywhere near the true figures, then there is only approximately 1/1000th of a chance of a rapist getting convicted. Is he really going to be scared of what punishment he may get if and when he is caught? I have a feeling most people who behave in this manner are not really thinking about consequences at all. What is it then that drive such behaviour? What is the root cause? And how can we attack the core of this problem?

Some points which come to my mind are:

1. Very low standard of living.
Poverty forces man to take jobs which no one wants to do. Imagine doing an extremely shitty job for 12 hours a day, getting paid like shit, and being treated like shit. How does he cope? He takes to cheap alcohol to get past each day, beats up wife to channel his frustrations onto the one person he believes is weaker than him. Such a person is looking for opportunities to take revenge of his own personal oppression over anyone he deems weaker than himself. How do we fight an opponent who has nothing to lose?
(Note: I cannot at this point ignore the polar opposites, the very rich and powerful people and their sons who  don't think any law and order can get to them at all. These are the people who have so much that they are also not afraid of losing anything!)

2. Age old traditions.
India being a male dominated society, there is always an excuse for discrimination against women. How will you argue with the head priest of a temple and convince him that what his 'god' told him about a woman's place in society is bull shit?? The head priest may not be a rapist himself, but he is encouraging an attitude among people (women included) which slots women into a particular role and makes her the weaker sex. How do we fight an opponent who has god on his side?

3. Bollywood item numbers.
This may or may not be a significant contributor, yet considering that Bollywood has a big influence on average Indian population, I cannot help wondering if somehow our casual attitude towards objectifying women in daily life and entertainment is somehow giving rise to something more evil than what we intended. For the past few years item songs and dances are no longer situational or realistic but more box office revenue generating additions, lapped up by general public. The catchy tunes and vulgar lyrics have made many of our feet tap (mine included), but now I am beginning to wonder if this in-sensitiveness is in fact contrary to what we are striving to achieve in our daily life. How do we fight our own urge to dance to 'Munni', 'Sheila' and 'Chameli' and deny ourselves the cheap pleasure we obtained from these numbers?

I know there are plenty other root causes, and I hope more informed and educated people are involved in studying and making policies against crimes like rape, oppression and abuse. I also hope that we don't all stop at  liking, sharing and updating our social network statuses but take at least one additional step towards recognising the evil we are facing and coming up with a concrete resolution of action in support. As usual I still think that education is the underlying, long term solution but in the short term we are left with many faceless opponents like poverty, traditions, corruption and of course our own personal attitude. We can and should make demands from the Government to take our ideas and concerns seriously but I don't think any external body on its own can come and save us from a mess which has been carelessly caused by each one of us.

And here like always I leave you all to ask your own questions, to make a difference in your own way and above all, as a new year plea (not resolution) I want to ask myself to not get so busy living an empty shell of a life that I forget to look around, feel and care.

Do you believe in logic?

I had taken a bit of a hiatus from this blog, but that does not mean I was not thinking, learning, applying or educating. Maybe the first three actions were more prominent than the last one. But here is my attempt to make it right.

So, I was in conversation with a friend, when he suddenly turned around and told me, what I was saying contradicted what I had said before, and that I was not being very logical. I completely agreed with him and yet heard myself lash out, 'If you want logic, why don't you go out with a machine, why bother with humans?'.
At another instant I recall another friend of mine telling me if he had to follow a religion, it would be that of logical reasoning. And I remember, at so many points I have found him so very very illogical and I have tried proving it to him, but with no success at all.

Scraps of conversations like this made me wonder about this situation. Is logical reasoning really an absolute as we make it out to be? Or is it only a set of rules developed by us humans to build computing machines? We feel, this way of thinking is simple, predictable and repeatable and thus it must make sense. But isn't it because we have created this world, and every rule that we have created is followed strictly within the boundaries of this world that it all appears simple?

Human minds however are not governed by these rules. We don't yet understand completely what our 'rules' are. Maybe we do have sets of rules (even if they are different and more complex) but the fact is we are still a bit of mystery to ourselves. And yet so many times I have found myself and even others (often people with more technical background) trying to fit inside these made up rules of logic and getting annoyed at others because they are not being 'logical'.

Personally I do believe that human minds follow patterns, and that we are a responsive species. But the most I can do is take time out every once in a while and try to truly understand why I did do something or not. (Unfortunately I have also realised it is quite easy to fool the mind to believe in a cause which was not true when the action was performed, but seems like the perfect reason in retrospect. This alteration of our own past happens almost naturally and makes me wonder if there is an unknown variable at work here which I cannot quite see.)

While I always feel there is a cause and effect for everything I think or do, I sometimes defy this by doing something completely random and surprising myself.
But is it really random? I guess I will never know. Not unless I am outside the boundaries of the human system, and I know every rule and every variable there is to know. Until then I guess I will have to make do with my will to learn, my best educated guess and my survival instinct.

Finally let me leave you with this, which I do believe in:

"Upon this first, and in one sense this sole, rule of reason, that in order to learn you must desire to learn, and in so desiring not be satisfied with what you already incline to think, there follows one corollary which itself deserves to be inscribed upon every wall of the city of philosophy: Do not block the way of inquiry."

- Charles Sanders Peirce, "First Rule of Logic"



p.s. I know psychologists study the human mind, but I have never studied this subject formally, and honestly most people I meet in life are these so called 'logical' engineers (including myself) and I guess this post is more for people like us. Although I would very much love the perspective of a psychologist and what their views are on the topic of 'logic'.

The alarm clock

Birthdays and anniversaries are like alarm clocks. Sometimes I wonder if we would be growing as old and as fast if we were not reminded of it precisely every year at the same time. Since when did we start celebrating birthdays? Since when did it become such a special day? A day to cut cakes, distribute sweets? A day of expectations? A day when you expect to be the center of attention. Is it because at some point people realized that we need at least one day in a year to be treated special? Or is it mainly the marketing of companies like Archies and Hallmark?
What about the fact that the inflated importance tagged with the date also gives rise to heart breaks, unfulfilled promises, failed expectations and thus leading to depression? What about the competitive nature of birthday celebrations which are taking place more and more these days? Parents going out of their way to celebrate their kid's first birthday in a five star hotel, just because all others are doing the same. Does a one year old even understand what a birthday is?

As with many other things in life, when the ritual becomes more important than the meaning behind it, I start getting uncomfortable and I have to ask questions. Why do you celebrate your birthday?  What is it you are proud of? What exactly are you celebrating?

Random train of thoughts

Having bypassed my pre planned Mumbai halt, I am now in Nashik with my family.  I had wanted to take the overnight train from Delhi to Mumbai initially. The whole experience of sitting in a train, and passing by many states and different sceneries in a single journey always excited me. Apart from that, the thought of building a temporary mini home for yourself within the single seat that is allotted to you is also exciting. The seat is then converted into a bedroom at night. But it is a slightly more interesting bedroom than the one back home. In the sense that you get to peep into random people's temporary homes, even see them get ready for bed and finally fall asleep to the gentle rhythm of the train.  I usually feel this rhythm for a few hours even after the journey is over and I am back in a static place.

The fact that you can observe people so closely for the entire period of the journey is one of the highlights of such a journey for me. In rare cases of course the observed party may not be all that interesting, and then you just have to make do with the book you are reading, the music in your ears and the scenery passing you by... but in some cases the co-passenger is a good looking intriguing guy, or a silent professor looking middle aged man, or a flamboyant teenage girl or a foreign couple smuggling a little puppy with them unofficially.

Train meals are also very interesting. Usually if the train has a catering service your order is taken in advance and you are served at a certain time. The train compartment now gets converted into an eating room and if you happen to have a family with lots of home made food with them, you even get offered some delicacies.
Waking up in the morning also means a fresh order of breakfast. Apart from train catering service there are also random hawkers on the train who serve a special variety of train-street-food. This brand of street food can only be had in trains or sometimes in stations but nowhere else. Thus eating, drinking and even playing games with fellow passengers is an inclusive part of train ride and as a child I have enjoyed these journeys to the fullest.

Why then can I not find time to take up such a journey now?
I am told people these days prefer to travel by flight. ( I myself took the flight from Delhi to Mumbai because I wasn't keeping too well the last week I was in Delhi). Most people don't have the time to feel the relaxed pace of a train journey these days. Trains are now the second option, and only people who cannot afford flights take them. I had initially started off writing about the many people I met in this trip who kept telling me they are so busy and they just didn't have the time. But all I could really think about are the memories of different train journeys from my childhood and I have to resolve to take effort to make this journey happen in future.

UPDATE: I did it!! Overnight train journey from Mumbai to Goa 2nd class. Awesome!! Try it to believe it!

scribbles: Census - See it now?

In a parallel universe, my better half has been working on the visualisation of Indian census data. Do take a look here. The work is not complete, but getting there!

scribbles: Census - See it now?

Diversity yes, but where's the unity?

From childhood I have heard greatness about India's diversity. Whether it be cultural, regional, geographical, religious or even of languages. It was always emphasised how different we are from each other within the same country. We were made to feel proud about our diverse nature and the feeling of being different was instilled so deep within us that we always became a Bengali, Marathi, Keralite etc. before an Indian. In fact the difference became all the more evident when I left my country and went abroad. I started realising that Germans flocked with Germans, French with French but Indians usually subdivided and South Indians flocked together, Marathis searched for Marathi community and even my parents asked me if I had found any Bengali association in the UK. The reason too was understandable. When I communicated with fellow Indians from parts of India I was unfamiliar with, I really could not relate much to them. It actually felt like we didn't really come from the same country. Regional differences aside, the class difference itself is so stark and prevalent in our country, that a person from lower middle class would have had completely different experiences in life compared to a person belonging to upper middle class (and I am not even comparing rich with the poor here!)

At this point the question arises where is the unity in all this diversity? My school text book always had a quotation on "Unity in Diversity". This is India's biggest moto. Then why don't I see signs of this unity anywhere? Why do so many states want their kingdom separate from India? Why do the North Indians and South Indians not get along? Why do people seek marriage alliances within their own community, culture, caste? The reservation system only pronounces the difference and inequality of certain sects of our society. Although it is aimed at equality, I don't see why an open category student would feel equal to a reserved category student?

India has such a huge population, collectively and as a team we can do wonders. However most of us are quite literally wasting our lives fighting this diversity. Right from getting admission into school/college and then later getting parents to approve our out of caste/community love interest and in successful cases living with the  sky high expectation of a culture we are unaware of.

Personally I think each of us consciously need to take steps to build this missing unity in diversity. Without a feeling of nationalism, we cannot really fight bigger battles of corruption, illiteracy and poverty. And for this I do agree social networks have indeed built a common platform where people from all over the world and country can share and react to different incidents in their day to day life. But I don't think this is enough. There has to be a change in attitude as well. There should be encouragement for people to leave their own home towns and travel to different parts of the country. Meet people from different places. Live in different environments. It is time we take definite steps towards being a citizen of the country before being regional.

Women are from Earth not Venus

So as expected I asked the most obvious question to the FAT (Feminist Approach to Technology) organisation. Why did they choose to call themselves feminists? Why not humanists?
The answer I was given was mainly the history of oppression of women. With time our society has become so male dominated that unless you fight for the cause of women you are not really bringing them up in the society.
I was also reminded that feminists are really looking for equality of men and women and they are not anti-men. There are in fact a few men who are part of the feminist organisation, who believe in the cause and have provided their support.

But I have a few thoughts about this.

Firstly, the word feminism has a slight connotation. Even if I am not afraid of the society and don't care about what people think about me, there are loads of people (women even) who are affected by this negative connotation. Calling yourself a feminist means losing the support of all these women who are not fighting for this cause just because of the image of the name.
Secondly, if this revolution is really about bringing equality, why not call it humanism? Calling it feminism instantly alienates many men, who are also part of the target audience and need to be educated as much as a woman. Making men aware of women being equal to them, automatically makes it easier for women to take more active steps to go out of their homes, into the world and do something meaningful with their lives. Educating men may lessen the struggle for an independent woman who otherwise will always be perceived as a rebel in the society.

I am very much in agreement with the activities the organisation is conducting. I agree that women have gone through hell, and need the support from the privileged part of the society to get truly liberated. It is important to fight for their equal opportunity. It is important that women take active part in science, technology, finance, politics, policy making and everything else that has for ever been predominantly a man's job.
But as I understand, this is a joint responsibility of every man and woman, and not just a few women. If equality was a product that I was selling, I would package it in such a way that every man, woman and child would want to buy it. I would not want to give it a name which has a possibility of alienating half the population. I would give it a more neutral name and conduct exactly the same exercises which this organisation has undertaken.

My personal belief is that a man and a woman are as equal to each other as they are different. This difference or equality is no different to the individual differences or similarities between a man and man or a woman and woman. As a woman I don't want to be equal to a man. I enjoy being different. I would only want that my society and immediate environment would acknowledge that I am as unique as any other human, man or woman.